13 years together, 13 reasons why traveling as a couple is the best way to fire up the relationship
If I can give one piece of advice to anyone who asks me about my relationship, it would be: do things together...especially TRAVEL! Traveling brings so much joy and it affects a relationship in a very positive way. It can help a couple to stay together, but most importantly, STAY HAPPY TOGETHER.
I met my American husband in Brazil while he was living and working there. I was just back to Brazil from living in England and was finishing my MBA. It was a very good sign for both of us. He took the challenge to work abroad and I was just back from studying abroad and ready for the next adventure anywhere in the world. After a year, exploring Brazil together, we moved to the USA.
13 years later and 30+ countries explored, we continue our journey with no plans to slow down
If I said my marriage is perfect, I'd be lying. Of course we have our ups and downs just like any couple, but I consider that we have many more ups together. I attribute it to doing things together that we both enjoy and our passion for traveling. Because of this shared passion, we built a solid and happy relationship, based on love, trust and excitement to discover the next adventure. We love to explore the world together, meet people and make new friends, and build memories in this journey called “life”. The excitement renews, as the cycle continues: Dream about the next destination, plan our trip, agree and disagree on the itinerary, talk about our experiences when we are back - Dream about the next destination…
After 13 years together, I am sharing 13 things why I think couples should travel together
1- Have a common purpose
Couples who travel together, stay together, because you are doing what you love. For me, traveling equates to exploration, learning, discovering new cultures, places and ideas. Even traveling to a place close to home for a weekend getaway is break from the routine and a reminder that life is more than what we see on a daily basis. Sharing this adventure renews the relationship. It is so refreshing to go somewhere new, and at the same time have the anchor of your spouse/best friend by your side.
Tip: Dreaming together about discovering and exploring your next destination and planning endless adventures with your partner helps to fire up the relationship.
2- Finding Balance
A secret for happiness and success in any area of our lives is to find balance. A couple traveling together is a perfect way to practice balance, as you will have to learn and adapt to the weaknesses and strengths of your partner and vice versa. If you don’t like to bungee jump, you can take the pictures of your partner in action – but the important thing is to respect each other’s style and individual preferences, and find a way to participate in the experiences together.
Tip: We find different ways to balance that make our trips even better. When we order food at a restaurant, we try each other's food and drinks. We take turns driving or taking pictures. We make plans on the go and adapt to the unexpected together.
3- Get out of the routine
I believe everyone would agree that the best way to kill any relationship, is to have a routine, without anything to look forward to. Imagine a relationship that you work and pay bills while you save for your retirement. Sound familiar?
Tip: Get out of the routine now! Book a trip and get excited about it. It doesn’t have to be any crazy exotic place, or take a plane across the world. You can take a weekend off and just drive somewhere different once in a while. The important thing is, get out of your routine! Now!
4- Experience the new together
Build excitement by discovering a new place, meet new people, taste a new dish, try that local wine….There are countless opportunities to experience the new together. I love trying new things, having new experiences and making the most of life...especially with my husband.
Tip: After you book a trip, you have plans to make together. On the trip, you will have so many experiences to share and memories to build. Live in the moment, treasure the present and all of the new discoveries. We frequently talk about our past trips and relive the memories and experiences, and talk about possible future destinations.
5- Practice detachment
It is so easy to get caught up in material things, and to develop the habit of “having things”. If both are in synch, and decide to save money for traveling, it is another positive thing for the relationship. There are additional benefits. Your house won’t be cluttered with things that you don’t need for example.
Tip: When you are on the road, you'll face all sorts of situations, such as not having A/C, the most comfortable bed, or a hot shower…. Detachment is a great exercise to practice while you travel, and even better when you have a partner in crime.
6- Build memories
What is the best way to build memories? Build memories with your best friend! Memories are the only really valuable thing we can build in this life that you will hold forever. Making memories together is a sure way to stay in love. Capture some of those moments in pictures and relive the memories...it is almost as good as being there again.
Tip: Plan that honeymoon you never took or book a trip for your anniversary. Or if you have kids, yes, go on a family vacation. Create memories for your family as well.
7- Great Communitation
We always have something to talk about! How many time have you been in a restaurant, looked around and saw a couple sitting at a table not talking. Instead, one or both are just play with their phones? Couples that travel together, always have something to talk about.
Trip: We often find ourselves talking about past trips and experiences or future options for trips. When you are with family and friends, you will be the cool couple who will have something interesting to share, and hopefully, inspire your friends to go on an adventure too. Or, inspire your kids to explore the world.
8- We are best friends
What is your definition of a Best Friend? If it's someone who stands by your side, no matter what and someone who accepts you just as you are, we would agree.
Tip: You don’t always have to agree or have an amazing moment, as long as you have someone to share the amazing moments, and also the hurdles of traveling (or life). It doesn’t matter the challenges you go through or the differences, you have each other and that is all you need.
9- Getting to know each other
Most couples come from different backgrounds. In my case, we REALLY come from different backgrounds – Brazilian vs. American. It is the beauty of our relationship. We add, accept and appreciate, without trying to change each other.
Tip: When we travel together, we learn something new and see things differently. Each person has a unique experience and perspective - even though they are doing the same thing. The chance to exchange our perceptions amplifies and enriches the experience. Whether you are from different cultures or not, sharing your thoughts on your adventure makes it so much better.
10- Control of finances
OK…another point that can be very critical in any relationship. MONEY! My husband and I share our expenses for our trips. It works great for us, but maybe it is not the case for every couple. Whatever works for you, the important thing is to have financial control.
Tip: Make a budget together, and travel within your budget. Not changing the car this year, because you have decided to travel instead – as long as both agree, you will be happy to feel that as a couple.
11- Build an expectation for the future
Remember how incredible the future was at the beginning of the relationship. It should continue to be like that. The future just keeps getting better.
For a relationship to last, it is important to have positive feelings about the future. Making plans together (no matter how small), keeps your life paths intersecting. Planning and discussing the future is one big way to make sure you have a future together.
Tip: Build excitement and create the anticipation of something that you can do together. Share a dream and realize the dream together.
12- Appreciate each other
You rely on each other. During moments of weakness, the other is strong. As I type this one, I am giggling behind my computer remembering things that I have made my husband do, such as hike the Himalayas at a fast pace while I made him keep up with me just to record a video.
Tip: Even on the little things, remember to appreciate your partner for the efforts. We all like to be appreciated, and what may seem small for you, can be a big challenge for the other. Come on, hiking the high altitudes of the Himalayas during winter is not that hard.
13- Discover more things in common
Last, but not least - It's amazing how traveling together helps the couple find LOTS of things in common. You will be in different situations and you will learn so much more about each other. Not only will you learn about your partner, but you will also learn a lot about yourelf. Traveling has a tendancy to do that to people. When we travel we broaden our viewpoints and grow in amazing ways. Traveling with your husband or wife is a way for your to grow individually and together.
Tip: Every year I include a different hike during our trip, and we train together for our vacation, besides bringing us together we also encourage each other to be healthy and fit.
You want to make sure your relationship lasts and you feel happy? Travel together! Go on a new journey with your honey and have fun. Life goes much beyond the everyday routine, and you will feel lighter and happier when you just let go – as you can see with these 13 reasons. Hopefully I will be back next year to write my 14 reasons to travel together 😉